"Success has nothing to do with what you gain in life or accomplish for yourself.  It's what you do for others." -- Danny Thomas

Alive & Well Archives

January 2002

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TODAY'S QUOTE:  "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give."

                                                                    --Norman MacEwan

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TODAY'S TOPIC:  Showing Your True Essence and Contributing to Others

When was the last time you volunteered or did community service?

Do you think it's better to concentrate on others or on yourself during challenging times? It may seem like concentrating on you is the best thing to do. However, there is evidence that volunteering for community service may prolong your life. University of Michigan researchers reported that retired people who volunteer 40 hours a year tend to live longer compared with those who never do community service. A Cornell University study of 762 retired people found that volunteers were happier than non-volunteers, and they had more energy and a greater sense of control over their lives.

These studies involved retired people. But what about the rest of us? I'm not aware of studies to see how contribution affects younger people.  However, I am certain contributing to others brings greater joy and fulfillment into our lives. It also gives a sense of control over our lives, because we can actually control our volunteer activities (unlike many other things in our lives).  

I used to think contributing meant giving money, so I generously gave money to charities and my church. It is very important to contribute monetarily.  But that's not enough. When you contribute just money, you don't get the benefit of seeing, hearing or feeling the difference you're making. To know you're making a difference, you must experience the volunteer work firsthand.

Let me give you an example. My mom's company adopts a family in need every Thanksgiving and Christmas. Her employees donate food, toys and clothing to the family. One year, the company adopted a family whose father was out of work and on welfare. Typically, the employees donate the gifts and never hear from the families again. However, the father of this family contacted the company the following year. Because of the employees' generosity, he found hope and inspiration. After receiving their donations, he found a job and no longer needed to be on welfare. In fact, he was so thankful that he donated $10 the following year to help the next family. Wow! How about that? How's that for making a difference in people's lives?

Let me give you another example. I personally discovered volunteering can be really fun, especially if you combine volunteering with something you enjoy. I love to sing, and I particularly love to sing Christmas carols.  This year, I realized I could simultaneously give to the community while doing something I love (singing). So I helped form a group of people to sing Christmas carols at a local hospice. Our intention was to bring joy to the patients and spread a little Christmas cheer, especially since the hospice didn't receive any other carolers.  

The staff, patients and patients' families enjoyed our singing. That was rewarding in and of itself. But we didn't expect the biggest reward -- we had a blast! We thought we were just going to give to others. But as we sang, we all glowed with happiness and peace. We found joy in it, and there was an incredible sense of fulfillment. In fact, although we were in a difficult and depressing environment, no one wanted to leave. We wanted to keep singing all day!

There was no way of knowing if we mattered or made a difference. We just had to enjoy ourselves anyway. But guess what? We received a phone call in January telling us how much the patients and staff enjoyed our caroling.  In fact, the hospice director asked us to return, and she asked us not to wait until next December! Well, how can we resist singing again? We're going back in February to sing love songs and show tunes. I expect we'll have a blast again!

This experience shows how we can bring happiness to others in need, while simultaneously bringing joy and fulfillment into our own lives. It's an amazing feeling! 

If you want true fulfillment in life, you must give to others. You must step outside of your own life and challenges. You'll definitely get perspective when you contribute. Contribution also gives you the opportunity to expand and grow. It's a chance for you to show your true essence - that of a caring, vibrant and loving person.

Contribution doesn't have to mean long hours. You can contribute by providing a friend with a helping hand, reading to a lonely child, assisting an elderly person with groceries, cleaning up a local park, or going to the local shelter. What matters is giving a little bit of yourself. What matters is stepping outside of your own world and making a difference in someone else's world.

So how about it? Are you willing to volunteer some of your time? If so, first think about what interests you. Do you want to assist the elderly?  Do you want to help children? Do you want to do something for the environment? After thinking about what interests you, think about what's a good match for you. Perhaps you know something about sewing, the law, carpentry, cooking, accounting, singing or some other talent. Find out where your expertise is needed.

Here are some other ideas to help you get started.

* Network for Good: (http://www.networkforgood.org) A non-profit collaboration that allows you to find volunteering opportunities on-line.

* Habitat for Humanity: (http://www.habitat.org) A non-profit housing organization that builds simple, decent, affordable houses in partnership with those in need of adequate shelter.

* Meals on Wheels: (http://www.projectmeal.org/search.html) Meals On Wheels delivers meals to people in need, including the elderly and disabled.

* Volunteermatch: (www.volunteermatch.org) Helps people find a place to volunteer on-line.

* Donate a Phone: (http://www.wirelessfoundation.org) Donate a phone is a national drive to provide domestic violence victims and organizations with a wireless phone.

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Coaching Challenge

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Within the next week, make a donation to someone in need. You can sign up to become a regular volunteer with an organization. Perhaps you’ll collect food for the local shelter or clean the local park. At least once this week, step outside yourself and help someone in need. I encourage you to make volunteering a regular commitment, even if it’s just one hour a quarter.